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Kung Pao Pussy

Reviewed on 10/22/2006 by J.R.

Score:
Amount of content: 8
Quality of content: 7
Navigation: 8
Price vs content: 7
Overall: 7.6

Category:
Main: Asian

Price:
3 Day Trial: $4.97 (recurs at $34.97)
1 Month: $29.97
3 Months: $59.95

Members Area Preview:
Screenshot #1 Screenshot #2 Screenshot #3 Screenshot #4 Screenshot #5

First Impression:
The site being reviewed here is Kung Pao Pussy. The site's theme is hardcore Asian sucking and fucking - white and black American guys screwing Asian chicks. The outside of the site plays heavily off Asian motifs for laughs while they show us samples of the models and the videos, but on the inside the site dispenses with that and focuses on getting to the hardcore action with these amateur-looking girls. Let's take a look at the member area of Kung Pao Pussy.

Review:
The site's layout and navigation is simple enough since every update is linked right on the home page with a thumb and episode number, the current update is the larger thumb in the upper left, and the upper right is a "site jump". If you're looking for descriptive text of any kind, including details about the girl or when the updates actually occur, you're screwed as there is NONE anywhere. The main page's "site jump" isn't entirely clear that this is one of the gateways to the bonus sites, but the pulldown's options make it self-explanatory enough. The navbar includes 3 links to various parts of the home page and 2 links taking you to places meant to get your money - a DVD & toy store, and a Video On Demand service (why they thought you who just joined a video site would want another video site is beyond me though). You probably won't be using the navbar anyway since everything really is on the main page. There are a few ads at the bottom of the homepage under the episodes and included bonus sites, not too obtrusive really.

Each episode's layout is pretty basic with a big link to the pictures and thumbnails with links to the video clips in various sizes and formats. Each video clip's page has a link to the next clip in that size & format as well as back links to the homepage and the main video page, plus a link to spawn the video in your computer's media player if it's not showing correctly on the page. The episodes' picture set pages have links to change thumbnail sizes in the upper left and navigating the set's pages right in the upper middle, again "basic" is the watchword.

Kung Pao Pussy's theme is Asian girls doing hardcore and it delivers on that in the most direct manner possible. There are a few threesomes but it's mainly 1-on-1. The girls seem run the gamut of Asian ethnicities rather than being ONLY Chinese or Vietnamese or whatever, and are average-looking to moderately-attractive without standing out; most of the girls are shaved but few tattoos or piercings adding to the amateur feel. The settings are various generic bedrooms and livingrooms, both decorated and stripped down to a mattress and a side table... Ah, the straightforwardness of internet porno - it's either sinfully salacious or just boring. Since the site makes few claims, it isn't hard to live up to them, but the girls start out already in underwear and quickly humping - I mean "jumping" into the action. If you want plot or setup, this isn't the site for you. And the variety is in the girls, not the action.

Kung Pao Pussy currently has 66 videos. I wish I could tell you how often they are updated but the site feels that apparently must remain a mystery. They have a "next update" section but when that'll be - who fuckin' knows? The videos are cut into 3 to 6 clips around 4 to 5 minutes in length each. Videos are offered in 1 size of Mpeg (321x240 to 365x300 depending on vid) and 3 sizes of WMV - low (160x120, around 78kBps bitrate), med (320x240, around 495kBps), and hi (400x300, around 880kBps) - in other words, fairly small, nothing stellar. The videos load smoothly with the larger-sized vids taking a tolerable few seconds to buffer, the playback is smooth although a couple times a little liney from being de-interlaced; Mpegs look good, but there's only 1 size; WMVs unfortunately look somewhat blocky at each size which is a shame since they load quicker and offer more options.

The videos are lit well-enough, neither murky nor washed out. The camerawork and settings are not putting fear into Scorsese with the cheap apartments, single angles, vague and minimal motion (juggling medium and closeup shots, drifting left & right... amazing), and few edits, yet it does stay on the action rather than getting needlessly artsy or tons of reaction faces. Almost none of the vids have music so it's all in-action sounds, and the audio on each one is turned down fairly low.

The only photos on the site are vidcaps. Each episode has a gallery of 'em so there are naturally 66 photo galleries, and each gallery ranges from around 45 to 100 photos. The vidcaps are fairly large at 750x563 but unimpressive quality going from 30 to 90k. Each photo page has links to turn on & off a slideshow which is simple but works well.

The site's bonus content gives you access to 25 other sites ranging various niches, a couple of which are actually related to this site's niche rather than this being the only Asian-themed site.

It's particularly annoying that there's no character inside this site - it's vidclips and vidcaps, no text whatsoever, it's direct but equally generic whereas the tour was direct yet had character. The site doesn't directly tell you where to go if you want to cancel your membership, there are 2 "support" links at the bottom of the site and you can cancel from 1 of them - but which? Depends on who you signed up with, I guess. Not to sound like a broken record, but no dates on the episodes just plain sucks.

Summary:
Kung Pao Pussy is an Asian hardcore site and delivers on that in a very direct manner. Its simple layout may not have any bells & whistles but is very straightforward so you won't be getting lost. The girls are a varied lot even if the action ain't. There's probably 30 hours of videos here, but the video sizes and qualities are a bit underwhelming; the only other content is photos that are video captures, though you do get a few display options. There's also bonus access to 25 other sites. A complete lack of personality and text inside the site brings the rating down, and I didn't like the absence of update dates. The end result is that if you're looking for Asian hardcore videos with amateur-quality girls rather than fancy page layouts, Kung Pao Pussy fits the bill.

Free Samples:


Picture gallery 1


Picture gallery 2


Movie gallery 1





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